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A Time-Out Trick

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A couple months ago time-outs became tough. Our rule used to be you had to sit in the time-out corner in the dining room for the number of minutes equivalent to your age—and if you kicked, screamed, or otherwise created drama, time-out started over.

There was kicking, screaming and drama. Always. It was miserable, for everyone.

Enter the hourglass sand timer, which I keep tucked away in our secretary.

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I purposefully chose glass.

Now the kids have to sit in time-out and gently hold the timer. I explained that it’s glass and holding it is like holding a bird’s egg—if it’s dropped or thrown, it breaks. The gentle handling requires almost immediate calmness.

It’s also a five-minute timer. At first I worried this would be too long, but they spend the entire time watching the sand fall, and they calm, calm, calm.

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Once the sand runs out we spend time talking about why the time-out had to happen, and follow-up with the usual apologies to those needing them, hugs and “I love you” from me.

It’s not foolproof. But for the most part it has greatly improved what had become a nonworking discipline technique.

Rarely do I have success with these sort of things, so when I do, I feel the need to pass these tricks along.

“While you’ll feel compelled to charge forward it’s often a gentle step back that will reveal to you where you and what you truly seek.” —Rasheed Ogunlaru


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